I have a saying, or actually it's not so much a saying it's a belief. If I hit my head enough times against a wall, I'll get through. It's not to say that I hit my head against walls, it's that if I believe in something I wont give up and it will happen eventually. Maybe the owner and his non stop Twitter activity had me believing last night.
And while all I could do was listen to the match, in the first half I was surprised we didn't go in three up and I was close to believing this was going to be our season. that is where I am - two wins in a row and I believe we're back. I think the difference is that I believe we should easily be winning this league, because of the quality of player we have and can attract.
I know that isn't universally believed, which in itself surprises me. And I know it's only three games, but last night did feel a lot like last season. And the season before and the season before that. So I can understand why some don't think we're going up. And I've written about why we should brace ourselves.
But had we won and we were on six points today, we'd all be believing it.
But it will change. I mean, I have to believe that it will change because if I don't then what else is there? But last night was close. Imagine winning two games in a row. I don't even remember when that last happened. How sad is that?
But I'm going to go blind. I'm going to hope. I'm going to create the optimism that it's all going to come good this season until it's mathematically impossible that it does. And I might even convince myself and others.
And I write all this because last night, at half time, I was so close to believing. Had the match ended as it could, we could have been sitting fifth today. Instead, after three games we're a point behind The Clowns.